"He touched their eyes and said, 'Become what you believe.'" (Matt 9:29 TM)

Is there a difference between faith and belief? Jesus told these men they could be what they believed. What do I believe? I believe I am saved. My eternity is secured in the arms of my Savior. I believe I am forgiven; this going hand-in-hand with salvation, of course. But what else do I truly believe? Or more to the point, where does my unbelief, my doubt, lie?

"Immediately the boys father exclaimed, 'I do believe; help me with my unbelief!'" (Mark 9:24 NIV) In the exchange preceeding this passage, Jesus had just told a sick boy's father that there is no room for "if", or doubt, in a believers' life. Yet many have plagued me, do so still. And I consider myself a believer. "Become what you believe," or "According to your faith will it be done to you, (NIV)" both seem to suggest that doubts about our Lords' power and authority over everything led, or at least contributed, to my failures as a husband, a father, a recovering person and in so many other areas of my life. In the ensuing unmanageability, these areas of my life were removed from me. But I need to look at those words again.

"According to your faith will it be done to you" does not say in proportion to your faith. A better understanding would be to say Because you have faith it will be so. Faith can not be used as a tool to manipulate God. It would be futile to think that God would not see through the logic of saying, "The more you give me the more faith I will have."

True faith allows the surrender of my life to God, not just selected areas of it. Being human, and possessed of a vicious self-will, I get in my own way. The faith I have today is more mature than the faith I had when I was younger. It is more forgiving, accepting, generous, trusting, serving, thoughtful, reverent, worshipful, joyful, praising, and human. It is no longer lip-service to a concept, but it more resembles a child-like belief that I serve a God who doesn't want me to fail any more than I must in order to develop my character. And His faith in me makes me stronger.